White Walls
by sky-lee
Summary: Exploring mental illnesses among the Gaang.


**A/N- Random oneshot/possible new oneshot series ideas are random. Enjoy!**

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><p>I live in an ice kingdom, and I rule with an iron fist. My citizens are gnawing, anxious to escape from their homes, eager to run rampant in the cold that has invaded the land. I constantly try to shake their pleas from my focus, to concentrate on the bigger problems facing me.<p>

"Katara," he says, coming up slowly from behind me and placing his hand on my shoulder. It's warm, but I'm too cold inside for it to register properly. Instead of shrugging it away, like I normally do, I let it rest. The weight of his hand feels reassuring for once; the pressure of it reminds me that I _am _a living, breathing person and not a corpse. I inhale his scent, the one that used to comfort me. Now, it mocks me. I become incredibly aware of how much I wish I could turn back time.

Warmth spreads down my arm as he slides his hand into mine. "C'mon," he urges, tugging my arm gently and pulling me away from the window I'd been staring out of. I follow him to the carriage outside of the house without any further hesitation. I sit down, and wait for us to start moving. I let my head fall to my chest and close my eyes. _If I pretend I'm invisible, he won't say anything. _

It shouldn't have shocked me so much when he did anyway.

"Do you know what you want to talk about today?'

"No." I start picking at the dry cuticle around my thumb. He knows I hate these conversations. The small talk.

"You're making some progress though. I can tell. What about you?"

"Not really." I just want to hide. "Spirits, can these ostrich-horses move any faster? I'm going to be late."

"Calm down. You know that Healer Wang won't mind."

Out of character, I try not to snicker at the fact that I'm seeing a mind healer with the name of Sokka's bearded alter ego. I sometimes think that seeing Sokka would help more. But he's just as messed up as I am…

Finally, the carriage slows down. I fling the door open, desperate to move from my temporary prison. Unfortunately, I realize that I'm going into another one. A legitimate one.

The large, three story building in front of me seems harmless from the outside; it could be any other community structure. But to those inside, it's far from benign. The endless expanse of halls and rooms go on forever, not a stitch of happiness in the place.

"Ba Sing Se Specialty Hospital," I groan miserably. "I'd rather be dead than be here."

"Don't think like that Katara," I hear his voice chastise weakly. "You're only making it worse."

As I walk into the building, a pit drops into my stomach. The annex is dark, lit only by the ample natural light of the overcast sky leaking in from the small windows in the highest peaks of the ceiling. The hallway ahead looks even less light, gradually getting darker the farther from the entrance you go. I can hear a distant shriek from far away. My footsteps echo ominously as I head down the hallway to a room on the left.

I quickly wrap on the door, desperate to get into a place with light. A few moments later, Healer Wang opens the door to lets me into his office. I take my place in the chair facing opposite his. I feel a sense of uncomforting familiarity wash over me.

"Katara, it's been a week since you last came in to see me. How have things been? Are you adjusting well to the less frequent visits?"

"Yes," I drone unconvincingly. Healer Wang casts me a look that proves he knows better. He continues anyway.

"Katara, I think it would be best if we continue to discuss…that day. We made so much progress the other da-," He looks at my crumpling expression and trails off.

I swear I can feel my upper body collapsing. The air is disappearing. What is happening to this room? For the umpteenth time, I wish for death.

Healer Wang senses my turmoil and tries to distract me. "Have you practiced water bending lately?"

"No," I gasp, "it's too painful. I miss him too much."

"I know."

"You absolutely do not! You have no idea what that boy, that man, that human being meant to me! Not just me, but an entire generation of people. How can you say that you 'know' when you were barely old enough to remember your mother's face?"

Silence. I breathe, suddenly feeling the air return. I smile slightly, feeling his presence engulf me. For once, it's not haunting or frightening. It's comfortable and I relax into this new found solace.

"Healer Wang, the Avatar is an amazing gift to the entire world, but Aang was a personal saving grace for me. I miss him so much that I can't even begin to explain."

"No one wrote a scroll on how to deal with grief. It's expected of a person in your position to swing through emotions so radically. This was a very good session for you; very cleansing. I think we'll end it here."

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><p>He rests his hand on mine once more.<p>

"Aang, I love you, but I need to let go of this grief, it's killing me," I say at last.

He hangs his head sadly, but allows a small smile. "I'm proud of you, Katara. So proud."

He begins to exit the carriage and I reach out to grab his hand. But it hits the empty space next to me instead.


End file.
